While on my jaunt to the lunch hour hogging center, I came across this spanking building that houses these two singapore biggies: Aviva and NKF. And I also spotted the following on the building:
...Officially opened by:
MRS. GOH CHOK TONG...
I was flabbergasted. Here I am, in a country of equal opportunities, a "developed" country, a country that is flush with money and soon to be rich in casino cash, and they could only label the person who presided over the opening ceremony as a "Mrs. Goh Chok Tong"? Doesnt she have a name? And if they do not find her "worthy" in her own right, why invite her in the first place?
And it is very curious why would anyone consent to open a building that doesnt even respect the individual doing the ceremony but rather prizes her relationship with the ex-Prime Minister (as a wife). And all this in a country where "meritocracy" is prized the most.
And very curiously, all google results have "Mrs. Goh Chok Tong" rather than her name! And it seems to be a tradition to refer to all women married to celebrities to be referred this way! How come the men who get married to celebrities do not get this "privilege"? Can we have Mr. Zoe Tay standing up please?
Comments
3 years 8 weeks ago, Deepak wrote:
Is there any way of submitting this to tomorrow.sg
3 years 8 weeks ago, divya wrote:
I just did =D Perhaps you can too, but you need to be a member first =D
3 years 8 weeks ago, Kaps wrote:
The PM's wife Ms. Ho Ching is a celebrity herself (by virtue of being the CEO of Temasek Holdings). Hence while she is being covered by the press for Temasek related news, she will be referred as Ms. Ho Ching. If she is being covered in the context of being the PM's wife, she will be called as Mrs. Lee Hsien Loong.
3 years 8 weeks ago, nmk wrote:
Divya:
You do realize that her name could also be Goh Chok Tong (as in her first name could be Chok Tong, a number of chinese names are unisex Wai Mun for e.g.). Hence her maiden name could have been XXX Chok Tong and hence her name after marraige is the same as her husbands. (note: with my minimalist knowledge of chinese I know that even unisex chinese names are written with different tones in chinese if the name belongs to a gent or a lady but I guess the distinction is lost when the name is written in English)
All this is highly unlikely.
From the comment about Ms. Ho Ching. Every one is aware that she is PM Lee's second wife? His first wife committed suicide or had a heart attack or something like that. It is very very hard to find any information about her even on the net. Does anyone smell something fishy.
3 years 8 weeks ago, Srijith wrote:
How many "well informed" Singaporeans will actually know the name of "Mrs. Goh Chok Tong"
3 years 8 weeks ago, antrix wrote:
Hah! Excellent find. Why isn't this t.sged yet?
3 years 8 weeks ago, divya wrote:
Kaps:
You do realise that this "classification" does not apply for men? I wonder why should we remain so backward while we claim intellectual compatibility (atleast!) with the americans and the british.
NMK: Please...that is soooo lame! If it is HER name, it wont have a "Mrs" next to it! It would be a "Ms". Yeah, it is funny we dont have any reference to the first wife in any term other than "the first wife".
g
Srijith: That is the saddest part! How many people know Cherie Blair and imagine how few know their own Prime Minister's wife!
Antrix: Perhaps you can help ;-) I am very anxious this reaches as many singaporeans as possible. Please wake up Singaporeans!
3 years 8 weeks ago, beAr wrote:
hi; you said:
"It is disconcerting that we do not recognize women for their own worth but simply change the prefixes of their husband's names."
but in this case, what is Mrs Goh Chok Tong worthy of other than being the ex-PM's wife? (mind you, i'm not saying that she's not of worth, but merely that it was her status as the first wife that resulted in her being "worthy" of opening the building. thus i feel that in this case, it's not wrong to refer to her as Mrs Goh Chok Tong.
i feel that your viewpoint will hold more water when we have a female prime minister and the first husband opens a building - and the name used is not the pm's name prefixed by Mr. however, since we do not have a precedent for this case, it is a tad unfair to argue that "this 'classification' does not apply for men:
having said the above, i don't deny that the singapore government is very imbalanced in terms of its gender ratio; perhaps that should be the larger concern.
3 years 8 weeks ago, divya wrote:
beAR:
If she isnt worthy of anything more than simply being the ex-PM's wife, then why invite her in the first place? Why not invite the ex-PM himself?
We have no precedence, which is precisely why we should invent them. If Singapore keeps looking to the past for answers, when will we move forward?
It isnt about the gender ratio, but more about the perception of women. And it is very obvious that women dont do much to transform this perception.
3 years 8 weeks ago, LcT wrote:
it occurs to me that the name was selected with Mrs Goh's permission. i might be wrong, but that is my assumption. and it seems to me that if she's ok with it, we shouldn't be kicking up a big fuss too.
if mr zoe tay is ok with being referred to as such, so be it!
3 years 8 weeks ago, beAr wrote:
indeed; why invite her in the first place? perhaps she was a patron of the foundation; however, her legitimacy of being a patron (if that is the case) is due to her being associated with her husband.
could she have been invited on her own terms? why not? she could have been one of those who has always supported the cause, especially if even before she became the first wife. the question is then, is she one of them? if so, then i'd agree with you that the name should not have read "Mrs Goh Chok Tong".
i'd argue that the 'gender ratio' is the physical manifestation of our 'perception of women', so in this sense our points do actually concur.
As for the point about the precedence, i'm merely stating the fact that one cannot assume (as you did when you mentioned that "this 'classification' does not apply for men") that the classification does indeed not apply for men - for in the present, there is no such case; nothing about the past, or the future. Can you say for sure that when the time comes for a first husband to open a building, the name will not read "Mr ?
and anyway, how should we invent the precedence? via legal means? personally, i do not think the value of women should be cheapened with legalese.
3 years 8 weeks ago, beAr wrote:
oops something wrong in the second-last para... accidentally used hmtl brackets; i mean "Mr [insert-wive's-name-here]" =)
3 years 8 weeks ago, Beng wrote:
Is the position of men and women (oops, see how I put "men" first too) really equal in SG? I don't think so.
Saw a male driver cutting you abruptly? Maybe you'll curse him and scold him an idiot.
Saw a female driver cutting you abruptly? Definitely you'll say "See? Here's how those women drive!"
3 years 8 weeks ago, Moomoo wrote:
Her maiden name is Tan Choo Leng.
3 years 8 weeks ago, al wrote:
.... she is also a top lawyer.
3 years 8 weeks ago, madras masala wrote:
a name is to address someone.then Y,in this world,do we use terms like maama,maami,chitappa,etc.Y cant we address them by their names?
3 years 8 weeks ago, madras masala wrote:
the person featured in this post and her spouse---pair of tongs.
3 years 8 weeks ago, ridj wrote:
Hi Divya, found you thru tomorrow. nice site.
3 years 8 weeks ago, Ram.C wrote:
This one is a good post Divya..
i accept the fact that most of the time, due recognition is not given to ladies....which needs to be changed.
3 years 8 weeks ago, angelsera wrote:
all this 'name changing' talk brought something to my mind...
a couple of my cousins (sisters and new sister in laws of mine) who got married, did not change their names after marriage.
For some of them, its for sake of convenience or rather the hassle of changin it everywhr...but one of my cousins told me this
"I am who I am and he (her husband) was not the one who made me, so why shd I give him the credit?"
and in spite of family opposition, she refused to change and her husband totally supported her on that move.
3 years 8 weeks ago, Anand Shekhar wrote:
Read an article in Today where this wife said she was glad to be submissive to her husband. UGH !
3 years 7 weeks ago, uma wrote:
good post. something to think about.
3 years 6 weeks ago, jhana wrote:
have you read Mrs Goh's comments as NKF patron? she thinks paying $600,000 to a multi-million charitable organisation is peanuts and why the public make a fuss over `expensive things'? apparently being rich she is incapable of feeling the ordinary men's hardship and sacrifice. i am disgusted.
3 years 6 weeks ago, smiley wrote:
I used to cringe when those 20-something collegues of mine married and changed their surname and called themselves Mrs something. Some even adopt double barrel names, like Goh-Tan etc. Then staff finds it difficult to locate their names in the phone directory. Have they got nothing better to do? (Hint: stat board and such incidence is more common in a particular division, fashionable and too free doodling down the permutations how they want to reflect their newly married status?).
Not that I am a feminist or don't respect my husband, but I think it is so weird, to change my surname that I have been using for the past 20, 30 years. I rather use "Ms" or "Madam" something.
Come on, marriage does not mean you are "married into the family" and change name, so dated. It is kind of implying you are "leaving" your maiden family. I feel that after marriage, a woman gains one more family, that's it, and not "transfer" to other family.
Though most angmoh women change their surname once married, but it is not common or widely practised here.
3 years 6 weeks ago, ahblabla wrote:
Just fyi, Mrs Goh Chok Tong is actually... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tan_Choo_Leng
3 years 5 weeks ago, JO wrote:
Thats because even if they had carved her own name, TAN CHOO LENG into the walls of that building, most people would have no clue who she is.
And even if they did carve her name TAN CHOO LENG, they would probably carve MRS GOH CHOK TONG in brackets under it.
She chooses to be called Mrs Goh Chok Tong. Simple as that. It has nothing to do with equality.
Its her basic human right to be called whatever she chooses to be called.